Perpetually Stuck in Transition, Optimistically

Asparagus Festival

2010-04-26T11:41:00.000-07:00

Spring

2010-04-26T11:39:00.000-07:00

Margie - Badass Angel

2010-03-25T16:04:00.000-07:00

Working in the Studio

2010-03-25T16:01:00.001-07:00

Ben

2010-03-25T16:00:00.001-07:00

More Headshots

2010-03-25T15:59:00.000-07:00

Florida - Grandfathers Wake

2010-03-25T15:57:00.000-07:00

Location Scouting

2010-03-09T09:44:00.000-08:00

Full Moon Over City Hall

2010-03-09T09:42:00.000-08:00

Too Much Fun

2010-02-25T16:40:00.000-08:00

Improvised ring flash :)

The Next Adventure...

2010-02-21T05:44:00.000-08:00

My grandfather, George Lott, died last night.

Production Shoot - Stinson Beach

2010-02-18T15:29:00.000-08:00

Sid

2010-02-18T15:19:00.001-08:00

Sean Headshots

2010-02-17T01:42:00.000-08:00

My Valentine

2010-02-14T17:22:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentines Day...

What do you say?

2010-02-09T08:55:00.000-08:00

What do you say to someone when you know its the last time you'll see them?

Saying Goodbye

2010-02-08T12:35:00.000-08:00

I seem to be the only person my Grandfather George wants to feed him (besides Linda Card - his caretaker. An amazing woman whom I am extremely grateful for). It might be because I'm the only other male in the house. He has surrounded himself with women who adore and care for him - but he cant stand it when they start telling him what to do. My grandfather has an instant connection with anyone he meets. He is the most observant person I've ever met. When I came into the room he stared at me - his eyes lit up, and the biggest smile you've ever seen flooded across his face. Even though he can't talk, I knew exactly what he wanted to say. And that was before I reminded him I was his grandson. He can barely hear, but reads the mood in the room by expressions and body language, and he doesn't miss a thing. If he notices anyone is crying he somehow finds a way to make a joke. Its hard to resist laughing when the dying guy is the one cracking funnies from his bed. Its easy to tell he's frustrated he can't speak. His communication has broken down to grunts, winks, smiles, growling, and stares. Don't try to finish a thought when he's stuttering his mumbles - you'll get a growl. If you happen to guess what he's trying to tell you on the first try - he'll stare at you with amazement, as if you're a magician that can read minds.

I can't tell how he feels about dying. I feel that it would frustrate him not being able to answer that question the way he would like to if I asked him. The most I can gather is he doesn't want anyone to be sad - no matter what happens. I will miss him with a smile on my face and a tear in my eye - I love you Grandpa George.

Grandfather George

2010-02-07T18:23:00.000-08:00

Traveling to Florida today to see my Grandfather George, likely for the last time, I had a layover in Atlanta, where I saw a woman reading a book called “Is reality an Option?” A better question might be “What is reality? And how do I get in touch with it?”

It’s a strange feeling visiting a relative for the last time. My grandfather is 95 years old. For the past few weeks he’s been having two small strokes per week. I’ve never been very close to him. The few times I had the pleasure to hang out with him, he showed me the excitement he has for life simply with his wonderful facial expressions and humor.

Clouds

2010-02-07T17:49:00.000-08:00

Window Light

2010-02-06T00:34:00.000-08:00

Beauty Has a Bite

2010-02-05T14:56:00.000-08:00

Headshot reshoot... bangs.

Velocity Circus - Mongolian Dance Troop

2010-02-04T08:28:00.000-08:00

24mm Tilt/Shift

2010-02-03T11:50:00.001-08:00

Super fun :)

Adventure Out on the Town (SF)

2010-02-02T15:00:00.000-08:00

A Closer Look

2010-01-31T10:55:00.000-08:00

These are X-Rays of my spine.

Blake (2 years old)

2010-01-28T13:12:00.001-08:00

Double Rainbow

2010-01-26T13:14:00.000-08:00

In the darkest moments we're shown that beautiful things are all around us.

Circus Makeup

2010-01-25T17:14:00.001-08:00

For those of you I don't talk to regularly, you may or may not know that I joined the circus. Most peoples first response to hearing this news is "What!?" - usually to make sure they heard me correctly, Im sure. The people who know me usually follow their first response with "I'm not surprised."

My specialty in the circus is Parkour. I'm not going to try to explain it in words - go to youtube and look up David Belle (the founder of Parkour).

I'll let you know when I have a public show :)

Macro Handscapes

2010-01-24T10:16:00.001-08:00

Weather in the Bay Area

2010-01-23T17:06:00.000-08:00

The Calm Before the Storm

2010-01-18T10:38:00.000-08:00

The Road Less Traveled

2010-01-16T12:23:00.000-08:00

Sleeves

2010-01-15T10:48:00.000-08:00

Caged

2010-01-14T09:21:00.000-08:00

Charlene

2010-01-11T10:28:00.001-08:00

Outtake from headshot session...

Elise and Brook - Fancy Scrabble

2010-01-10T13:31:00.000-08:00

2010

2010-01-03T22:24:00.000-08:00

Its a new year, a new decade; an opportunity to inspire new projects and life changes. My heart was recently broken (an interesting start to the new year) - I've had my heart broken before, but not like this. I'm in more pain than I've ever experienced - and yes, I have broken bones, had migraines, meningitis = spinal tap, stitches... none of it comes close to this. And at the same time I've never been so awake and aware of my feelings (probably why it hurts so much) - I'm staring into the abyss and it's staring right back, and I'm going in.

The one certain thing I've experienced in my life (so far) is that there is always an upside to pain - physical and certainly emotional. It seems as if the universe gave me a wakeup call - my eyes are open. And now the search for truth, understanding, and reality begins - in the darkest deepest chasm I will find the answers I seek. It's not going to be an easy descent, and it will be even harder to get back. But from the chasm I will emerge stronger and wiser. My time has come - I've been broken to make something new.

Happy New Year.

If You Lose Your Mind, Come Back

2009-12-30T14:48:00.000-08:00

Day trip toward the lost coast on Highway 1, in search of our sanity.

Mexico for the Holidays

2009-12-29T20:42:00.000-08:00

La Paz, Baja

2009-12-28T09:05:00.000-08:00

The Four Agreements

2009-12-25T07:04:00.000-08:00

The Four Agreements (by Don Miguel Ruiz)

1) Be impeccable with your word

2) Don't take anything personally

3) Don't make assumptions

4) Always do your best

Help Portrait

2009-12-24T21:55:00.000-08:00

This month photographers from all over the world donated their time to take pictures of people who wouldn't otherwise be in a position to be able to afford nice pictures of themselves and their families. I had the pleasure of going to one of the Walden houses in the San Francisco Bay Area to take pictures of people living in an assisted living house for people with HIV. I had so much fun meeting people - everyone was warm and welcoming. Selfishly it made me feel great to be able to give my time to make someone else happy. It was a great way to put the holiday season in perspective.

I can't post any of the pictures I took for privacy reasons - I gave all the rights away. But I will post a picture of my assistant - I hope she doesn't mind :)

Dance!

2009-12-03T00:35:00.000-08:00

Everyone in the world eats. Everyone in the world sleeps. And everyone in the world dances.

Christmas Tree Internment Compound

2009-12-02T15:37:00.000-08:00

Im surprised people are still selling real trees for christmas - not very surprised, but a little.

...They do smell really good.

Hi Ho Silver Oh

2009-11-30T19:42:00.000-08:00

My best friend is in a band called "Hi Ho Silver Oh." This is a picture of the band.

Bunny Kisses

2009-11-25T21:16:00.000-08:00

Autumn

2009-11-23T21:08:00.000-08:00

This is my favorite time of year - everything changes, simplifies in an ornate display of colors. I sometimes wonder if there is any functional purpose for the leaves of trees to change color in autumn, or if its simply the "ugliness" of death.

Homemade Ring Flash

2009-11-20T14:58:00.000-08:00

Natural Light

2009-11-18T12:12:00.000-08:00

Natural light instinctually kisses beautiful skin softly.

Swim from Alcatraz

2009-11-17T14:47:00.000-08:00

As I watched people jump into the San Francisco Bay, my first thought was; these people are crazy to swim in water that cold (especially without wetsuits). My second thought was; I've got to start training if I'm going to swim this next year.

Tattoo

2009-11-16T23:43:00.001-08:00

The Hallway

2009-11-14T23:21:00.000-08:00

I started this blog with the intention of adding text regularly with my pictures - lately I've found few things worth mentioning. I'm in a place in my life where I feel as though I'm stuck in a hallway - working to get where I want to go. Somewhere there is a staircase that leads outside - I want to find that staircase.

I've always been a dog person

2009-11-13T10:19:00.001-08:00

But I love all animals.

SoCal with Paddy

2009-11-12T13:33:00.000-08:00

Margie

2009-11-11T12:32:00.000-08:00

Stinson Beach weekend with the Gasparini's

2009-11-10T10:21:00.000-08:00

Halloween 2009

2009-11-09T01:21:00.001-08:00

Marin County Triathlon

2009-11-08T19:12:00.000-08:00

Marin County Triathlon - swim start.

My First Post on My New Blog

2009-11-07T22:50:00.000-08:00

This is officially my second blog - my first blog was called "The Science of Change", its theme was my experience working on a fishing boat in Alaska for the summer of 2008. The theme of this blog will be broader than my previous adventure, and it will focus on, but will not be limited to, my photography.

Welcome!